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An Ecology of Relationships: The Importance of Mutual Learning
“It takes two to know one”
Gregory Bateson
When I was a graduate student at Columbia University, I always carried Gregory Bateson’s book, Steps to an Ecology of Mind* with me. In several chapters Bateson used what he called “Metalogues”, a dialogue between a father and daughter. What follows is my metalogue about an ecology of “Relationships.”
Daughter: Dad, why do you talk so much about the importance of Relationships?
Father: Hmm, good question, I remember hearing that to know oneself you need to be in relationships.
D: Does that mean we will eventually know ourselves better through relationships?
F: Well, we all have that potential.
D: What stops us?
F: Viewing our world as having many separate parts with injurious consequences such as narrow-minded education, unequal distribution of wealth, and discrimination to mention a few disconcerting outcomes.
D: Whew! Ok, can you show me what that means?
F: Here is an example that I learned from Aikido, which you know is the martial art that I practice. Put your fist out and push against my fist. As I put pressure on your fist, what are you doing?
